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First in a series I’m working on called “Conversations with Gabriel”. Because there are some things that people need to hear more than “turn to Jesus.” Like, “I believe in you.” The rest will follow.
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It was ten in the morning on a Thursday in Stillwell, Kansas. And everyone knew it.
Laurie held an-old fashioned letter opener in her hand, absently tracing the names and dates on her crinkled desk calendar. The day’s first customer had yet to walk through the front door, and the soft, rhythmic sound of the fan in the office window was enough to put anyone to sleep. There was an old radio with a wire coat hanger for an antenna under the counter, but her boss didn’t let her keep it on very loud and the one station in town was broadcasting only broken static at the moment.
Sighing heavily, she dropped her forehead down to rest against the desk. It was going to be one of those days.
“One of those days?”
Laurie lifted her head blearily.
A man of about thirty sat on top of the tall postage counter just across from her desk, elbows on his knees as he regarded her curiously.
Laurie looked from the stranger to the door, to the small bell hanging above it. Maybe it was broken.
She returned her attention to the only eventful thing to interrupt her morning. The man in question was wearing a pair of jeans and a bright white t-shirt; the picture of unremarkable normalcy. He was attractive, but there was something in his attitude that defied physical attraction. Kind of like a preacher. Except that he was perched on her counter like a cat.
She blinked at him.
He cocked his head at her, and now she was sure that he was a cat. Somewhere between the climbing temperature and the maddening silence of the Post Office, she had begun hallucinating. This man was just Alexander, the temperamental gray cat that Mrs. Jorgensen allowed to live under her porch because it reminded her of her departed daughter.
“Alexander?” She asked flatly, half-convinced that he would ‘meow’ back.
“You mean the cat? Come on, it hasn’t been that bad of a day.”
“Sorry. Who are you?”
“Gabriel.”
“You’re not from town.”
“Was it that obvious?”
Laurie nodded. She wished he would climb off the counter; he really looked like a cat.
“Why are you here?”
Laurie wanted to yawn. The combination of the surreal conversation and the agonizing slowness of her day was somehow exhausting in all its uneventful bleariness.
“I work here.” She retorted flatly. “Why are you here?”
“I was passing through.”
“And you decided to make a pit stop to sit on the counter in the Post Office.”
The man smiled widely; he had perfectly straight, white teeth. “That sounds about right. So what are you doing here?”
“I just told you that.” Laurie dropped her chin into one hand. She was too tired to hold it up on her own. “Why do you ask so many weird questions?”
“I’ve only asked one.”
“Well, that’s one more than I usually get a day.” Laurie wondered if she drifted off and woke back up again, if she might find Alexander sitting on the counter across from her staring at her condescendingly.
“So why don’t you answer it?”
“Because it’s weird.” Laurie griped, frowning.
“Humor me.”
She sighed, wishing she could chew a piece of gum. She did when it was slow sometimes but if her boss were to drop by and catch her, she might lose her job. After a moment’s contemplation, she really couldn’t remember why that was a bad thing.
“I’m here because it was easier than going to college.” She admitted flatly.
“Ah.”
Ah? “That’s it?”
“Well, what would you like me to say? It was your decision to make, after all.”
“Yeah, but considering that you’re like twenty years older than me I expected you to tell me that it was the right decision and I should stay in town and stuff, or that I’m wasting my life here and I need to go learn something.”
“Leaving and learning aren’t necessarily synonymous.”
“Yeah, see, now if I’d run off to college like every other kid I graduated with, I might know what the heck that means.”
“It means you don’t have to leave Stillwell to learn something.”
“Yeah. I stayed here, and I learned a heck of a lot about sending packages to places I’ll never go.”
The man stared at her, a half-smile playing at the corner of his lips.
“What?” She sighed apathetically, chin in her hand again. She thought about turning off the fan since it was blowing warm air at her and making her want to fall asleep on her feet, but that would involve walking over to the window. Definitely not worth it.
“There are a lot of people who feel the same way that you do, you know.”
“I’m sure there are.”
“I mean it.”
It was Laurie’s turn to stare. “Are you a preacher?” She asked the question that had been on her mind since she first laid eyes on the man.
“No. Do I look like one?”
“Not really. But you sound like you’re always just about to tell me to get Jesus.”
“Would that be a bad thing?”
“I don’t know. It’s what everyone tells me.”
“Do you listen?”
Laurie shrugged one shoulder. The radio crackled. “Not really.”
The man looked thoughtful, drumming his fingers on his knees.
“I don’t need someone to tell me to get religion, honestly.” Laurie sighed, wondering why she was talking to a complete stranger. “I need someone to tell me to get off my butt and go do things in the world before I die. And then maybe religion will come, because there will be something in my life that’s worth saving.”
Gabriel looked very solemn. “You don’t need me to tell you any of that, actually. You just said it all yourself.”
“Yeah, but I don’t think I believe it yet.”
“Why is that?”
“Because there is nothing in my life that’s worth anything.”
“Circular reasoning.”
“See, that’s another one of those things I might know more about if I had gone to college.”
“You probably know more than you’d think.” Gabriel insisted. “Not all small-town high-schoolers can read Dostoevsky and understand it.”
Laurie frowned, eyes flickering down to the dog-eared copy of Crime and Punishment stuffed under the counter with the broken radio.
“How did you—“
“It’s not a crime to learn more about the world. It’s a big place, full of new things. Raskolnikov is a good example of a man who let himself get swept up in knowledge. You seem to have a good head on your shoulders. I don’t think you need to worry about that happening to you.”
Laurie stared, intrigued. “You really aren’t from around here, are you?”
Smiling, Gabriel went on. “Dostoevsky went through a period of exile too, you know.”
“This isn’t exactly Siberia.”
Gabriel looked pleased with her connection. “No, it isn’t. But it does go to show that everyone goes through periods of change and stagnation in their lives. Maybe it seems like a drought now, but those can only last so long.”
“Okay, now you really sound like a preacher.”
“Sorry.” Gabriel smiled brightly.
“I’m kind of confused.” Laurie admitted. “Why did you come in here?”
“To talk.”
“You don’t even know me.”
“Exactly.”
Laurie’s eyes narrowed. “You are a preacher.”
Gabriel sighed. “Not really.”
“I knew it.”
“If you must label me, call me a missionary.”
“A missionary for who? Or what?”
“I thought you didn’t want anyone preaching religion at you.”
“You’ve interested me.”
“Really?”
“Don’t sound so surprised. I’m not a complete heathen.”
“I supposed nothing of the kind. If you would like me to fulfill your stereotype, however, I suppose I could tell you to get off your butt and go do something in the world before you die.”
“I intend to.”
“Really?”
“Yes.” Laurie nodded emphatically. “If only to make you get off my counter before my boss comes in and yells at me.”
Gabriel hopped off the counter, smiling. “Done. Now, what are you going to do with your life?”
“I’m going to go somewhere.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. I’m going to get into college.”
“And then?”
“I’m going to travel. And get a job that pays me to do it.”
“Wow. That’s very ambitious.”
“So was Raskolnikov.”
“And he wound up committing murder.”
“Several, actually.”
Gabriel grinned. “I think you’ll make it.”
Laurie smiled despite her lethargy, feeling invigorated and perhaps a little excited for the first time in months. “You really are an odd guy.”
“I’m from an odd place.”
“So where’s that?”
The back door creaked loudly, and Laurie jumped. She looked over her shoulder as her boss came in and began rummaging in through boxes at the back of the small office.
When she turned around again, Gabriel was gone.
Walking around the corner of her desk, Laurie opened and shut the front door a few times. Every time the hinge swung, the small bell above the frame sounded loudly. For good measure, she stuck her head outside and peered up and down the street in both directions. There was not a soul in sight.
“Laurie!” Mr. Thomsen yelled testily. “Stop playing with the door!”
She pulled back inside and returned to her desk for her tattered paperback.
“When you’re done jacking around, there’s some work for you to do.” Her boss scowled as he worked. “This place is a mess."
“Actually,” Laurie smiled, snapping her nametag off the ugly gray polo shirt she had to wear to work every day, “I have other plans for today. Filling out college applications, to be exact.”
The balding man that used to be her boss sputtered as she pressed the plastic tag into his hand.
“You can’t just—“
“Actually, I can.” Laurie shot him a smile, halfway out the door. “There are a lot of things I can do. And I intend to.”
Grinning, she let the bell ring on her departure, and didn’t look back.
She had places to go.
